Lakewood Should Be An Island

The new proposal to create bike lanes and reduce traffic flow on Madison Avenue down to one lane each way has caused me to take pause. At first I was absolutely and resolutely opposed to yet another attempt by the city "planners" to restrict, delay and dissuade my travel in my vehicle down Madison Avenue. They have already succeeded in forcing me to avoid Detroit Avenue with their asinine middle turning lane "improvement." As a result of this change I am forced to traverse east and west via alternate routes including Clifton (which lost a lane due to the bus lane designation) and Lakewood Heights (which is barely driveable due to pot holes). Now they want to turn Madison Avenue into a one lane with a bike route? 

In the middle of my belly aching I had to stop for a moment. Why not? Why not follow through with this idea? But let's take it a step further. Let's actually BAN ALL MOTORIZED TRAFFIC on Madison avenue. I am thinking we could turn Lakewood's Madison Avenue into a mini Mackinac Island. We could restrict motorized vehicles. We could bring in horse-drawn carriages. We could encourage bicycling, walking and carriage rides. I think the 250 businesses along Madison Avenue would encourage this kind of improvement*. (*number based on 2011 Madison Avenue Merchants Association printed information sheet). 

Of those 250 businesses located along Madison Avenue I can really only think of one that would benefit the most from this absurd redesignation of our passable roadways. That business is the Spin Bicycle shop located at 14515 Madison Avenue. And while I will be the first one to concede that I could benefit greatly from less griping and more biking, I can say that running errands in my horseless carriage is my only viable option due to the hectic nature of my jam-packed schedule. Between being a full time parent and a self- employed musician, cycling for pleasure or even to run to the store is not an option. I, like most readers, feel as though I wake up an hour behind schedule every morning. Then add to that the delays and slow downs caused by the one lane of traffic on Detroit Avenue. The wait times to simply pull out of my street and into traffic on Detroit Avenue. And now the proposed one lane of traffic with bike lanes being proposed on Madison Avenue. It is becoming woefully obvious that progress is something that the city planners are falling very short of. 

Who in their right mind could think that this is a good idea? Do the city planners live here? Do they shop and drive and commute and do business here? Do they look up from their computer screens and spread sheets long enough to see that Detroit Avenue is no no longer navigable? Do they comprehend that some things are better left alone. And if they are going to choose to destroy our east/west thoroughfares at least have the creativity and gravitas to go the way of Mackinac Island. Let's just ban the use of motorized vehicles altogether. It is obvious they are setting this city back with their total lack of planning. They might as well set us all the way back...Back to 1898!!!

I look forward to seeing how they deal with the horse manure. That waste, when combined with the minutia they are planning to force down Lakewood driver's throats is going to create quite an impediment to anybody moving east or west with any ease down Madison Avenue. However, if I were an astute politician (an oxymoron I know) I would spin that to translate into more jobs! Horses will stimulate job growth! We will be in need of street cleaners!

Before you destroy Madison Avenue, why don't you use some of that money and repave Lakewood Heights so that citizens like myself can get in and out of town and to other cities to frequent their businesses without any issues. As it stands now, I do not plan on adding another headache like the one you are proposing to my already full scheddule. I will not patronize Lakewood businesses if I cannot easily and speedily get to them. I will instead, play dodge 'em with the chuck holes, leave my fair city and spend my money elsewhere in other more consumer friendly municipalities. That is until they all adopt our mantra. Then I will be forced to flag down a Coachman, board a pony trap and take my grand tour of Lakewood Island.