Can We Ever Talk Again? Are Scapegoats Being Served At YOUR Dinner Table?

It HAD BEEN a great meal. Outside the restaurant window, the day was slowly slipping away, as the azure skies gradually turned to amber, in the fading away of a perfect afternoon.

After a good restaurant meal, inevitably, discussions arise among old friends - about topics often avoided in the company of less trusted individuals. On this particular day, the topics turned to crime and politics. Before long, general statements about groups of people began to emerge at the table. Some of these comments then crossed the line from being statements, into being passionate pronouncements. Before long, that great meal began to turn on a few stomachs.

Politics and religion have long been topics that can cause passionate discussion among friends. If those discussions get too passionate, those friendships of course, could then be endangered. Lately, it seems that quite a few other topics- economics, crime, medical care, the environment, you-name-it...can also inflame passions and cause anger to arise; even and perhaps especially, among old friends.

I would guess that many of you have also had a good meal ruined by some of these discussions. Perhaps unwittingly, YOU may have ruined a few of those yourself. Let's face it, at one time or another, we've all probably said something to somebody that we wish we hadn't said.

We live in trying times, although to be truthful, one could make the case that ALL times can either be trying, or filled with opportunities and hope, depending on one's outlook or personal circumstances at the time.

But let's face it...THESE times? Well...

In the last year alone, with the crash of the economy, the turmoil of unending war, the horrors of crime in our cities, the uncertainty of our futures and our health care...it's only natural for dinner table talk to turn passionate.

And then, some people start looking for scapegoats.

A scapegoat might be a person, or group of people, who are blamed, often without evidence, for the ills of some aspect of society. Through the centuries, many groups of people have been used from time to time as scapegoats for one malady or another. The process of scapegoating has never truly disappeared, but during "good" times, scapegoating all but goes away, except at society's fringes.

Well, scapegoating's back big time- and we know it, don't we?

Since the government did away with the "fairness in media" doctrine in the 1987, (a Federal Communications Commission broadcast license ruling from 1949 that had mandated that all sides of a controversial issue be presented in balance) there have emerged "conservative" and "liberal" TV and radio shows that support a particular point of view, under the protection of free speech. For those who share in the point of view of these newer programs, it's been delightful. For those having opposing views, however, it's been a different story. Historically, in the '50's and '60's in this country, there arose an exponential growth of alternative "liberal" print media activity opposed to war, and favoring women's rights, ecology, and other issues. In the '70's and '80's, it was therefore only natural, that "conservative" voices would also demand the right to their own media points of view, and so that's pretty much how all of this activity came about, as it is today.

One-sided reporting to promote or disparage a cause has been referred to as "propaganda", and is a technique often seen during wartime. Many Americans, these days, seem to thrive on wanting to hear the news from a one-sided perspective, however. Whether that news might be "liberal" or "conservative" driven, it would appear that some of those involved with their respective media outlets often seem to want to go to great lengths to deny being truly propaganda-like. Instead they may simply claim to represent the truth (but oftentimes, as THEY see it, of course!).

That all of this filters down to you and me would be a given. All of us probably see things through the lenses of our own beliefs, perspectives, and experiences, BUT at least thus far, we've USUALLY been polite enough to keep our opinions respectful...

That seems to be changing now. These days, I'm hearing all sorts of scapegoating going on, and I suspect that you are too. Some people seem to be blaming just about anything and everyone for the maladies of life. Plus, many appear to be doing it with a whole lot less respect and good manners than I've ever seen before. It just seems to me that more people nowadays are rising to engage in verbal combat, scapegoating, and the blame game; whether in the workplace, or at the dinner table.

I have a deep personal aversion to blaming any "group" for anything. Problems are generally created by individuals. Using "groups" as scapegoats can only take us down a path that humanity must never use again. That path leads only to oppression, concentration camps, and worse. We need to stop blaming groups for the actions of individuals. We must take, and demand, greater personal responsibility in this world; particularly in the pulse of this city; and more especially, at our dinner tables.