Bad Neighbors, or Ugly Property on My Street

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Mark Crnolatas
Posts: 400
Joined: Fri Mar 25, 2005 10:32 pm
Location: Lakewood, Ohio

...

Postby Mark Crnolatas » Sun Apr 02, 2006 9:19 pm

I hate to over use the phrase " back in the good old days"..especially when many of those "old" days were not so good, but regardless; when living on the street I grew up on, here in Lkwd, if someone left their house in a nasty shape of any sort, or the front yard in a state my grandmother used to say "looks like 25th", someone would call City Hall, someone would come out to the house, talk to the homeowner and voila, end of the problem.

I have NO idea who it was, or what dept they came from, but it wasn't the police. I have no idea what was said, or if a fine was levied, mainly because I didn't pay attention that close, being a kid and later a teen (who's only interests were playing jazz, cars and females) but it ALWAYS worked.

*blinks*


Mark


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Jim O'Bryan
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Re: ...

Postby Jim O'Bryan » Mon Apr 03, 2006 7:44 am

Mark

I think that still works. If I am not mistaken the city also inspects all adjoining properties as well. But ti is up for someone to call. This is the breakdown now. People are afraid of their neighbors. What if they find out? What if it starts a yard war?

It would be interesting to see where this started. When did Lakewood neighborhoods become castles instead of homes? The whole country is cranked up in fear, at the same time unemployment approaching an all time high in this economy that some say are getting better!

At the end of the day most park the car, run to the garage, and pray no one knocks on the door. This is the trend we must break in this city. We must all start walking the streets, and taking responsibility for our neighborhoods again. Lakewood has everything that is needed to make it the safest city in the county. Front porches, yards, places to walk to and yes even corner bars.

FWIW


.


Jim O'Bryan
Lakewood Resident

"The very act of observing disturbs the system."
Werner Heisenberg

"If anything I've said seems useful to you, I'm glad.
If not, don't worry. Just forget about it."
His Holiness The Dalai Lama
Bill Call
Posts: 3313
Joined: Mon Jun 06, 2005 1:10 pm

Neighbors

Postby Bill Call » Mon Apr 03, 2006 9:33 am

It has been my experience that if you have to tell someone to stop living like a pig you are wasing your time when you tell them to stop living like a pig. They look at you like YOU'RE the one that's crazy.

In the past, the City had a reputation of being tough on scaflaws of all kinds. Rudy Guliani found discovered that aggressive enforcement on quality of life issues had a positive affect throughout the City of New York.

At a minimum we need more aggressive action on the part of the City on punch bars and housing enforcement.


Charyn Varkonyi

Postby Charyn Varkonyi » Mon Apr 03, 2006 10:02 am

Jim writes:

People are afraid of their neighbors. What if they find out? What if it starts a yard war?


And Bill writes:

They look at you like YOU'RE the one that's crazy.


I think you are both touching on societal problem that spans across region, or perhaps even the state and/or country. I have long since pointed out that the tide seems to have turned such that those people who dare to raise a complaint about their neighbors, their co-workers, other people's pets & children, etc., are branded and shunned as if THEY were the ones that were behaving inappropriately.

I am pretty vocal in person as well as on line and if I find someones behavior to be offensive - I request politely that they change the behavior. As in "Please turn your music down", or "Can you please keep you child from running back and forth near my table in the restaurant" or "Can you please cover your trash so it doesn't blow in my lawn" etc. I only call the police, building department, animal warden, or boss when repeated polite attempts to get my point across have failed.

In response to polite requests I get to be screamed at with any number of vulgarities, doors slammed in my face, completely ignored (or better yet they respond with even MORE of whatever the 'offense' is) - and to the call to authorities, bosses, etc., I received harassing telephone calls, tp'd and/or egged house, my children harassed as they walk home from school etc.

All because I dare to speak up when they neighbors are blasting Metallica at 1 AM? Or because I got tired of having to clean my yard every Wednesday from all of the trash blown around? Puhhh-lease!!

Sadly, I feel that people that have such reaction do so because they have found that it works. For most at least. They get hostile and the neighbors back down and let them continue to drag the neighborhood down. BUT------------------ I have also found that if I am persistent and unyielding in my expectations, the music DOES eventually stop playing, the trash eventually DOES get picked up, etc. But it is hard and I really wonder if there are enough people willing to go through the hassle of 'storming & norming' as I have described, or as Lisa described, they just leave for someplace where the norms they desire are already established.

FFT

Peace,
~Charyn


Charyn Varkonyi

Postby Charyn Varkonyi » Mon Apr 03, 2006 10:06 am

YIKES!!!!!!!!!! - I need to be clear in the fact that Mike & I bought our home on McKinley last October and the events I described were PRIOR to that!!!

I am very blessed now with neighbors that are friendly, welcoming, attentive their homes and the condition of the neighborhood. (I would love to see THIS neighborhood as the 'norm' - less the number of houses for sale.....)

The experiences I write about were from our time in Parma and in the Marlowe/Clifton area.

~C


Mike Deneen
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Joined: Sun May 08, 2005 12:02 pm

Postby Mike Deneen » Mon Apr 03, 2006 10:11 am

Charyn is right on with this issue!

People have become less familiar with their neighbors all over the country.

From Glenville to Strongsville, people don't sit on the porch/stoop and mingle with their neighbors like they did 40 years ago. The days of strumming the guitar and drinking Aunt Bee's lemonade are long gone.

There are many factors. I'm sure republicans will cry "cultural decline" and "decline of the family". I disagree. I think it reflects the fact that households need multiple breadwinners to maintain their standards of living, leaving less time for neighborliness.

Of course, part of the problem may be too many people spending time on the internet. Hmmmmm.....if only someone could create a website where Lakewood neighbors could meet and share ideas online......


Radoslav Karabatkovic
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Location: Lakewood, OH
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Postby Radoslav Karabatkovic » Mon Apr 03, 2006 2:47 pm

One thing I've noticed since living in this country and what the difference between Europe and the US is, is that in europe...(ex. bosnia and germany) your neighbors are your extended family; in a way. It's normal to spend a sunday morning chatting with your neighbor over snacks and coffee.

Here, maybe three houses on our whole street knows each other, and its through school and their kids playing together.

it's sad and cold..

but that's the lifestyle difference that i had to adapt to.

i got sick of that though.
that's why i'm taking part in the observer, to get to know my city and neighbors more. i'm quite thankful for it!

if it wasnt for the LO i wouldn't have met all you guys!


"I know that the accident of me being a photographer has made my life possible."


"after all, I'm just the photographer that makes the writers work look pretty."-Ivor K
Charyn Varkonyi

Postby Charyn Varkonyi » Mon Apr 03, 2006 2:57 pm

Mike writes:

I think it reflects the fact that households need multiple breadwinners to maintain their standards of living, leaving less time for neighborliness.


I absolutely agree! Other factors that I think contribute....

(a) An overly litigious society - which results in an over-all feeling of distrust & fear of being sued

(b) Big suburban & exurban developments that are created in a way that promotes exclusion of non-development dwellers.

(c) Houses without porches!!

I am sure there are tons of other things that contributed to the problem... but the million dollar question is what will contribute to a solution... any takers?

Peace,
~Charyn


Radoslav Karabatkovic
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Joined: Sun Oct 09, 2005 8:47 pm
Location: Lakewood, OH
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Postby Radoslav Karabatkovic » Mon Apr 03, 2006 3:19 pm

we have a block party every year, i think those are fun not only for the kids but the adults also come out of their caves and shelters and socialize a bit!


"I know that the accident of me being a photographer has made my life possible."





"after all, I'm just the photographer that makes the writers work look pretty."-Ivor K
Jay Foran
Posts: 58
Joined: Tue Aug 02, 2005 1:18 pm
Location: Lakewood, Ohio

Postby Jay Foran » Mon Apr 03, 2006 3:29 pm

I believe my wife's adage particularly rings true on this topic:

You pick your friends, but God picks your neighbors.


I believe we all have something to learn from our neighbors through the trials and tribulations He presents us..about ourselves...about each other.

Personally, I think the last 25 years in our society have focused on one strategy....define your opponent before they define themselves. Watch any talk show, particularly political shows, and you will see what I mean. In my opinion, this approach has carried over to neighborhoods and the result has been resentment and distrust. For me, this is an unhealthy development and a bigger part of our culture now than we may want to admit.

FWIW....effective neighborhood schools, a strong community library, the YMCA, and community efforts like the Observer and LakewoodAlive are beacons for enlightenment, engagement and understanding. While more is no doubt needed, our community has made many positive steps of late.


The future does not belong to the strong and powerful, but instead to the swift and agile
Phil Florian
Posts: 538
Joined: Fri Jan 20, 2006 4:24 pm

Postby Phil Florian » Mon Apr 03, 2006 7:37 pm

Thanks for the advice so far and the discussion. Some great points were raised.

I don't think the days of strumming the guitar and sitting on the porch sipping lemonade are gone, at least not on our street. There is quite a bit of that going on around here, even with the guitar from time to time (though we tend to sip beer or wine while the kids play in the front yard). I think we need more power outages of a couple summers ago. That had people out in droves because there was no a) air conditioning and b) television. But I bet the former is more the reason for people evacuating their homes than the latter.

The block party is a great institution to get into contact with reluctant families. We did this a summer or two ago with one of the block parties. Our family and a few others tend to be the ones that get the ball rolling on our street and we made an effort to reach out to a new family on the block that seemed removed from the goings on (for discomfort with cultural and/or religious reasons I suspect). Anyway, this family was interested in getting involved in the planning and by the time the event happened, they had been involved, attended planning meetings and made food for the day of the event. They were out there in force and their kids mingled with ours. A great way to build some bridges.

Maybe waiting until block party season would be good since informal attempts at just social niceties were rebuffed. I like the idea of using the Spring Cleaning idea to make in roads with the family. Doing this with some other neighbors this Saturday with some yard working gloves and grubbies on willing to help out might be great. It could send it over into an uncomfortable direction but we should be willing to go that far. And then there is clearly the City Hall route if that doesn't. People are trying to sell their homes on our block and it can't be easy with a house looking like hell not too far away.



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